Ode to a failed driving exam

I flunked my driving exam today, flunked it with flying colours. It all started so well. There I was, driving perfectly - slowing down at curves, stopping at red lights, looking into my blind spot - would have made Schumacher proud. Even the examiner commented on how well I drove. Then it all went downhill. When he asked me to park. Not park, I thought, not park! But park I had to. Blotched it, of course, completely and utterly blotched it. And then the mistakes started piling up. But the last nail in my coffin was that I didn't stop for a pedestrian. I just knew that would happen! And that was it - a big, fat F, for failure.

So I've been down in the dumps all day. I tried to not let the failure get to me, really made an effort not to, but to no avail. Guess I'm just too God damn sensitive. Always have been. So to try to make myself feel at least a bit better, I started thinking about a few of my favourite things. And then I thought, why not write them down and try to get them to fit to the tune of "My favourite things"? So here it is, a few of the Knitting Songbird's favourite things, set to the tune of the original classic. Try not to get a hernia laughing:

Schubert and Mozart and Webber and Gershwin
Edith and Ella and Eva's Imagine
Going to choir and hearing us sing
These are a few of my favourite things

Eclaires, Valrhona and piping choc chaud
Creme brulee, bischottentorte and macarons
Whisking egg whites for pavlovas with wings
These are a few of my favourite things

When my teacher shouts, when I fail my test,
When I'm feeling mad
I simply remember my favourite things
And then I don't feel so bad

Paris and Venice, Vienna, Normandy
Quimper, Denon, Madrid, Burgundy
Wonderful places with memories that cling
These are a few of my favourite things

When my teacher shouts, when I fail my test,
When I'm feeling mad
I simply remember my favourite things
And then I don't feel so bad

And here's the original and definitely the best. And don't worry, I won't be giving up my day job - not for songwriting anyway!

Baby, you can drive my car

I had my 11th hour of driving lessons today. You also could say that I started learning at the 11th hour. A bit old for an absolute beginner, aren't I? I sort of regret that I didn't start learning to drive early on but circumstances prevented me from that. Namely, an accident my mum had with a bus. She was driving me to school in Bankstown and was going round a corner parallel to a bus. Thing is, the bus didn't see me and my mum next to him and "crushed" us going round the corner. On my side. It wasn't anything as major as it sounds, but nonetheless, I sort of lost my appetite for driving from that moment on...and still haven't found it.

I have to admit that, so far, I hate driving. And that's an understatement. Can't think of a stronger word than hate at the moment. Too late in the day. Remember how I talked about how much I love Mondays now that I go to choir? Well, any day I have a driving lesson is a day I loathe. If hubby and the kids see me ranting and raving and storming round the house, listening to AC/DC or Lou Reed full blast, they knows that a driving lesson is looming. There are a few reasons for this. First of all, I'm totally and utterly untalented at it. I'm uncoordinated. I was never good at piano because of it. Dancing too - two left feet I've got. I can't see the "wider picture". Went through a yellow light today, for example, 'cause I looking at how fast I was going. Second of all, drivers in Zagreb are, to put it bluntly, complete and utter bastards. These are people that, for example, honk at foreigners waiting too long at a traffic light. Hey, the guy is from out of town! He doesn't know where the hell he's going! Third of all, I don't really like the idea of getting around in a car. I prefer walking, taking a tram or riding my bike. The world goes by a bit slower, get to take a better look at things, smell the roses if I want. Can't do that driving at 120km/h, can ya? And fourth of all, I don't like the idea that I'm contributing to climate change, increased pollution, spiking oil prices. I'm a drop in the ocean, I know, but lots of drops make an ocean pretty quick when you think about it.

Having said that, I would like to have the added flexibility and freedom that driving offers. No more waiting for Mr. Hubby to take me to Dolac, Zagreb's green market. Oh no. Sit in the car and I'm there in 20 minutes or so. Or choir. Or French lessons. Or coffee with a friend. Or a midnight movie. See, that's a concept I can live with. Do what I wanna do, be what I wanna be, yeaaah.

Well, we'll see how it goes. My instructor doesn't keep me for after driving "lectures" ("you did this, you didn't do that, you shoulda done this, bla, bla, bla") like he does his other pupils - which sometimes keeps me waiting a good 15 minutes for my lessons to start! So that's something positive. But maybe it's because I'm older than him and could lecture him if I wanted...don't know...might drive round to his house and ask him when I get my license...