For the past two weeks, I have been sitting in "my" room, "my" being a very wide term to describe this room where I sing, play the piano, write blogs, knit, make teddies, read and do a plethora of other activities in, usually on my own or sometimes with hubby in the armchair next to me, always with his laptop atop his lap, mouse in hand, without any curtains. This may seem like a strange state of affairs but the basic fact of the matter is that I'm just too plain lazy to put the curtains up. As is the custom in these here parts, I washed them just before Christmas (as I did most of the nooks and crannies in the house) but haven't had the strength to get up on a step ladder and stick approximately 50 pins through 50 holes and put them up. Now I've gotten more than used to being "curtainless".
I particularly like being "curtainless" while I'm singing. See, I have a view of the backyard and the field behind our house from the window. And although the trees are bereft of their leaves and the grass has turned a sickly yellow and the plants are languid at the moment, it nonetheless fills my heart with joy to see this view. Particularly the day before yesterday when some birds came to listen to my singing on a tree about a metre and half from the window. My first "real" audience, I thought, cool, this is nice.
My curtainless room also reminds me of my current state of mind. I too feel curtainless. Namely, because I finally sat down today and wrote that email to that radioman, the email I have been planning to write since I came back from France in September but have been too chicken to do so. But I feel the time is right, despite the fact that my stomach is in a knot and my heart feels as though it's going to jump out of my chest and I feel completely and utterly exposed - to ridicule, laughter, criticism. But I said to myself, Songbird, it's Christmas, it's a time for making wishes and for making them come true. JUST DO IT! And I did. So wish me luck. I'll definitely keep you posted on the outcome - if there is any, that is! But even if there isn't, I won't give up. I'm too Taurean to do that!
And here's the song that inspired the title of this post. Sing it almost every day. Won't make it on the CD unfortunately, doesn't fit in with the concept swimming round my head, but I love the song anyways.
Paul Hewson shooting star
Prije 7 god.